Wow, it’s been a long time since I’ve sat down to write! This summer ended up being a lot more planes and traveling than I had anticipated. Allie and I were gone 5 out of 8 weeks.
We had our R&R to San Diego and Utah during the end of May and into June. A few weeks after we returned home to Jamaica my grandmother had a series of mini strokes and declined quite rapidly. As a result, Allie and I headed back to Utah, unexpectedly, for her funeral. We stayed nearly two weeks. My philosophy is that if I’m going to make the trip with an 18-month-old on my lap I’m not turning around and doing it again after only a few days.
We attended my Grandma Jean’s funeral early on in the week and enjoyed the rest of our time spending our days with family. I’m so grateful I was able to make it for Grandma’s funeral. I’m glad that Jamaica is close enough I can hop on a plane with a days notice and be there for the important things. There were many people there to honor her and celebrate her life. My grandpa has been gone for two years and I know grandma was anxious to reunite with him. I think my dad said it best in a text he sent me “We are happy for her but sad for us”. I will miss my Grandma dearly but I’m forever grateful for her influence and example in my life.
Allie went to her first amusement park, enjoyed her first ride on a boat, got to celebrate Pioneer Day in Utah, walked Grandma Robin’s dog countless times, and ate a lot of ice cream. On our flight back to Jamaica this time we were delayed four hours which is never fun with a baby. Two of those four hours were sitting on the plane at the gate but not moving. That is torture.
We returned to Jamaica for a measly three weeks before we were back on Delta flight 70 on our way to Utah again. This trip was planned due to Cassidy’s wedding. Not knowing I would have just been in Utah this trip was scheduled for another two weeks! Scott promised me when we joined the foreign service that we would make it a priority for me to visit home and that was definitely fulfilled this summer.
Unfortunately, on this trip Allie experienced her first sickness that included throwing up. It was awful. She then passed said sickness onto me. Which then was passed through every member of sisters household and my parents household. The thing was merciless!
We were lucky enough to be there for Utah State’s first football game of the season!! Scott was arriving that night and had plans to make it to the second half but his flight was diverted to Twin Falls, ID due to weather. He was sorely disappointed to miss it. It was fun to share the experience with Allie. By the end of the game she was even cheering and doing the motions to our spirit song. Our child doing “The Scotsman” is quick literally a dream come true for me and Scott.
The obvious highlight of this visit was the wedding of Cassidy and Brad. It was a beautiful day and we loved being a part of it. Allie had a bit of a hard time with all the people and attention but managed to look cute regardless.
After the wedding we headed to the airport and took off for our trip to Costa Rica. That trip will have a post of it’s own later!
Spending so much time in Utah this summer has been wonderful. But it’s also hard sometimes to not get caught up in the feelings of what could be. I went to the park with some friends and their kids one afternoon, hung out at the pool with Scott’s mom, met my sister for lunch, etc. Suddenly it hit me that if we lived here this would be everyday life and not a luxury. And for the first time since we got to Jamaica that made me really sad. I don’t know why it hadn’t hit me like that on previous trips and all the sudden it did this time. It’s the what-could-have-been-syndrome. And then it really hit me when we went to football game. As silly as it sounds, Aggie football is such a huge, fun, memorable, part of my childhood. It makes me think of family, spending time together, and making memories. When we walked into the football stadium it made me sad that it won’t be a part of my own family’s script because it’s such a cherished part of my growing up. Such a trivial thing to be affected by! But I know that it’s okay for me to feel this way sometimes even when it seems to be so silly.
Even though I was experiencing these twinges of sadness it was in no way debilitating to me. I remember that my family is making our own script. And it’s going to be just as wonderful and warm and fuzzy as Autumn in Logan going to football games with cousins but in it’s own way. Right now our script includes reggae, jerk chicken, mangos, and world-class beaches and that makes me happy. I used to feel like I couldn’t be both sad for Utah and happy for Jamaica all at once but I’m learning that I totally can be and it’s not wrong of me to feel either way.
Although spending so much time with family this summer was the best, followed by a pretty spectacular trip to Costa Rica, I’m ready to stay put in my own bed for at least a few months!